Love gained. Love lost. Or was it? Chanel I thought I finally had found my happy. Yes, I lied about my past to Xavier, but I never suspected it would blow up in my face the way it did. Now he's gone, won't answer my calls, and now, I'm left with nights plagued by nightmares, and that's only when I'm able to get to sleep at all. I'm pretty sure Xavier and I are over, but why does that revelation cause my chest to ache, and the world to feel like it's spinning off its axis? I'm all too familiar with rejection. I know I'll get through this just like I got through every rejection in my past. I hope. Xavier Yes, I left. But not for the reasons I gave. Yes, Chanel lied about her past, but that I can get passed. It's my own anger that scares me. The thought of losing yet another woman I love at the hands of another man was too much to bear. I needed to get away and focus on work, but Chanel is never far from my mind. I know we'll see each other again...eventually. And when we do, I know I've got some explaining to do. We both do.