You feel bad now only because you deserve more than you have, and are capable of more than you give to this world. The problem is not that you are somehow crooked and damned, that all people as people are normal, and you are not capable of anything. Wrong way round! This only suggests that your fate does not fit into the banal formula of the life of an average person. This only means that you have some kind of your own, unknown path. I know why you are so bad inside yourself, I know a step-by-step way out of this situation, because I have already passed this path earlier. And what I will tell you about is my life's work.